The travel checklist for a trip with an older parent

Plan the trip on paper first

Write the whole journey out as a line: front door, car, park, terminal, check-in, security, gate, flight, arrivals, transfer, hotel door. Put a time against each step and a distance against the ones that involve walking.

That single page does two things. It shows you where the trip is actually difficult, which is almost never the part people worry about. And it lets you ask sensible questions in advance rather than solving problems in a queue.

Mark every transfer, every change of level, and every stretch longer than a few hundred metres. Ask each operator what the real walking distances are, and whether there is a shorter route with assistance booked.

Choose the time of day deliberately and write down why. Note where the toilets are on each leg, where you can sit down, and where you can stop if you are driving — most people plan a break every two hours or so on a long drive, but set the interval that suits your parent and put it in the plan.

Share the page with whoever is travelling and whoever is staying behind. Everybody then knows where you should be at three in the afternoon.

The document folder goes in the hand luggage

One slim folder, in the bag that never leaves your hand. Not the suitcase, not the boot of a car, not a phone alone.

Photograph every page of it before you go and put the images in the shared folder, so a sibling at home can read anything out to you over the phone.

Check two dates before anything else: passport expiry and insurance dates. Many destinations require a passport to be valid for a period beyond the return date — check the requirement for your specific destination well in advance rather than the week before.

• Passports or ID, plus a photocopy of each kept separately
• Any visa or entry paperwork, and the destination's current entry requirements printed out
• Travel insurance policy: document, policy number, and the 24-hour assistance number
• The emergency contact sheet, current version
• The current medicine list, printed, exactly as on the labels
• Doctor's practice and pharmacy details with reference numbers
• Tickets, booking references and hotel confirmations, printed
• Assistance booking references for every leg
• A note of who at home holds copies of everything
• Some local cash and a written note of the address you are staying at

Medicines as luggage

This section is entirely about transport and paperwork. Nothing about what to take, when, or how much is a question for this page — that is for the pharmacy and the prescriber.

Medicines travel in the hand luggage, in their original labelled packaging, with the printed list in the same bag. Checked bags go missing, and a labelled box with a matching list is what makes any conversation at a border straightforward.

Ring the pharmacy well before you travel and ask three administrative questions: how much notice they need to supply enough for the trip plus spare days, whether they can provide a printed list or letter for travel, and whether anything you are carrying needs additional documentation.

Then check the rules, not the rumours. Ask the airline about liquids, needles, batteries and any equipment you plan to carry. For an international trip, check the destination country's own rules on bringing medicines in — some substances that are routine in one country are restricted in another. The embassy or consulate website is the place to check, and check for every country you transit as well as your destination.

Split the supply between two bags if two of you are travelling, so one lost bag is not the whole trip.

• Hand luggage only, in original labelled packaging
• Printed list in the same bag, matching the labels exactly
• Pharmacy called in advance: notice needed, printed list or letter, any extra documentation
• Airline asked about liquids, sharps, batteries and equipment
• Destination and transit countries checked for their own rules
• Supply split between two bags if two people are travelling
• A photograph of every box, in the shared folder

The assistance to book in advance

Book assistance at the same time you book the ticket, not afterwards. Most of it is free, all of it needs notice, and none of it can be arranged on the day.

For flights, request special assistance through the airline at booking and confirm it again 48 hours before, at each leg including any connection. Say what is needed in plain terms — help through the terminal, a wheelchair to the gate, help boarding — and get a reference number for each leg. If your parent uses a wheelchair or a mobility scooter, tell the airline the dimensions, the weight and the battery type, and ask exactly how it will be handled and where it will be returned to you.

For trains and coaches, book assistance through the operator and ask what the notice period is. For a hire car, check the parking arrangements at every stop.

For the hotel, ask specific questions and write the answers down — vague requests produce vague rooms.

• Airline special assistance, per leg, with a reference number, reconfirmed 48 hours ahead
• Wheelchair or scooter: dimensions, weight, battery type, and how it is returned
• Aisle seat, or a seat with an armrest that lifts, requested and confirmed
• Rail or coach assistance booked through the operator, notice period noted
• Hotel: step-free access, lift, distance from the room to the lift and to the restaurant
• Hotel bathroom: walk-in shower or bath, grab rails, shower seat available
• Bed height and whether the room can be on a lower floor
• Parking, drop-off point, and how far it is from the entrance

The bag list

Pack the hand luggage as if the checked bag will arrive a day late, because occasionally it does.

Everything needed for twenty-four hours goes in the hand luggage: medicines, documents, a change of clothes, glasses and a spare pair, hearing aid batteries, chargers for everything including any medical or mobility equipment, and a plug adapter.

Think about the specific discomforts of the journey rather than the destination. Terminals are cold; a layer that is easy to put on and take off matters more than a stylish one. Queues are long; a folding stick-seat is worth its weight. Food arrives when the operator decides, not when your parent is hungry.

Label everything with a name and a mobile number, including walking aids, which are frequently set down and left behind.

Put a small card in your parent's pocket or bag with their name, your name, your mobile number and the name of the hotel. If you get separated in a busy terminal, that card does the work.

• Twenty-four hours of everything in the hand luggage
• Chargers for phones, hearing aids and any equipment, plus adapters
• Spare glasses, spare batteries, a spare walking stick tip
• A warm layer that is easy on and off, and comfortable shoes already worn in
• Water and food that does not depend on the operator
• Name and mobile number labels on every bag and every walking aid
• A contact card in your parent's pocket: their name, your name, your number, the hotel

What you arrange at home before you leave

The trip includes the house you are leaving behind. Half an hour on this beforehand prevents most of the phone calls you would otherwise get while you are away.

Send the itinerary page, with times and flight numbers, to whoever is not travelling. Add the hotel name, address and telephone number, and the insurance assistance number.

Make sure somebody at home holds a copy of the document folder — photographs are fine — and knows where the originals are. Tell them plainly what you would want them to do if you called from the airport needing a document read out.

Deal with the house: post, deliveries, heating, a key holder, and any service that visits on a schedule. If regular visits need to be paused or moved, do that in writing and confirm the restart date. Put the restart date in your calendar, because a paused service that nobody restarts is a problem waiting on the doormat when you get back.

Finally, write down one line for each of the first two days back: what needs to be reordered, restarted or reconfirmed. Do it before you go, while you can still think clearly.

Questions